Hours before heading to Mesa Verde Cave dwellings , I was watching a video with our kids about the history of Colorado. The video gave in- depth information and instantly drew us to another video about the cave dwellings specifically . We decided to watch a guided tour as we were teeming with excitement for this newest and most anticipated adventure .
As we embarked on this video , I instantly realized what I expected, wasn’t reality . This wasn’t a nice safe walk and boom beautiful cave dwellings . This most photographed portion of the destination, the absolute cherry on top photograph in my mind ,involved climbing a ladder , did I mention cliff ? My heart began palpitating , I had visions of my children falling down and me missing a step causing a crowd of others getting hurt because I slipped . My palms started sweating and I began to unintentionally hold my breath. My kids could see my face and said what’s wrong ? I quickly changed my face to a smile and said “oh nothing , just watching the video.”
They said “ oh my gosh mom isn’t this going to be amazing “ I thought to myself “ no, it’s absolutely terrifying and I can’t breathe “ but I responded with “ absolutely” . Of course giving my children anxiety about it , wasn’t the wisest choice so I chose excitement .
As we continued watching the video the tour guide said , the only advice I can give you is “ don’t look up and don’t look down , focus on the steps you are on .” The crowd laughed and one lady replied “ well of course , if you look down you see how far you can fall, and if you look up you get anxious about how much higher you have to climb .”
You would think that’s when the revelation hit , but nope , my anxiety heightened and I realized that they too understood the fearfulness of climbing the ladder and needed to lighten the mood . The kids looked at me after the conversation ended between the people and they too looked at me like “ uh mom, are you going to let us do this ?” Mom wouldn’t let us do this if it wasn’t safe or we could get hurt,” replied Nathan .
I paused and said “honestly kids , everything we do involves risk. Getting in a car, walking on the street or even eating food . But we do it , because there is no enjoyment in life if you constantly think of the what if . Some risk takes little to no courage and some take lots of courage and then some takes courage that we absolutely can not formulate on our own without God .”
As I was speaking I was navigating to the cave dwellings website , still sweating with this undeniable pressure in my chest . I was locating ticket prices and age limits for everyone and an alert popped up. It said the treehouse version of the cave dwellings , the part of the attraction we all anticipated and longed for was closed for a need for structural inspection. I honestly had the biggest ,I mean biggest weight off my shoulders .
There would be no climbing the ladder .
The kids were a bit disappointed that we got rerouted again, but we ended up finding the coolest campground after and decided to stay 2 nights , which we never do . I truly believe the kids had more fun here then they would have on the big scary ladder .
Fast forward to being back on the road after a heated debate with my husband and as we both sat in silence . Then the actual revelation hit …..
“Steps , steps, steps .” That’s all I kept saying to my husband or anyone I meet , which I know gets annoying . But honestly that’s how I feel the Holy Spirit speak to me about my life . The lord knows my anxious thoughts and calms them with an assurance that each step has already been made , I just need to listen closely even when it doesn’t make sense and ultimately it will lead exactly where I am meant to be .
That’s when the remark of the tour guide in the video actually resonated with me . Now as my mind was focused on gaining strength and some sort of peace after being completely agitated , it all started coming in.
You see when I was anxious and not capturing my thoughts , I was unable to receive revelation. I was so focused on the fear .
You see , there are steps to every thing in life . Whether Worldly order or kingdom order . I have a choice. Should I listen to the gentle whisper that leads to life and fruit or listen to the world and lead to exhaustion and self promoting gain and pride .
Both choices have steps . The world’s steps are usually ones you see , the ones that always makes sense , a+b=c , ones you can explain the outcome . Kingdom steps usually take faith which means you do not see at first , ones that sometimes make no sense , and 1+ God = exceedingly abundantly more than you could have ever done on your own .
The key to your ultimate destination is simply what the man in the video said . Do not look up and do not look down , focus on the step you are on .
When you are climbing steps and are struggling to gain footing on one , do you immediately try to grasp above even though you aren’t firmly settled on the step you are on ? Listen , I wish I could say I’m not that stubborn , but I have tried this and yeh , moving forward when you aren’t firmly rooted or have learned the lesson of that step ,results in pain , being overworked unnecessarily or falling straight on your butt .
Today I’m not physically able to see my promise , today I am still wobbling on the current step but still believing , and today I am accepting and surrendering to the process that this step entails for my good . I am focusing on the current step that God has me on , without looking up the ladder with anxiety with how far I have to go , or looking down ( or back) with how far I could fall.
All my steps are placed , all your steps are placed . God is for you . The steps are perfectly laid out for you and your destiny . Do not be anxious . This is for his glory .His goodness and mercy follow you , so stand firm , keep listening , keep seeking , keep asking ….. what you seek you will find . What God has for you , is for you … God doesn’t run out of his goodness , God doesn’t forget , God is patient .
This is kingdom business , his ways are not ours, so rest easy …. Everything God has promised already exists , so let’s believe 🙂 ❤️
❤️You don’t have to pick up the phone to call or text me every day for me to know you care
❤️You don’t have to explain yourself if your anxiety is the real reason you want to cancel plans
❤️You don’t have to be careful with your words and replay our conversation , we all need a safe space to vent
❤️You don’t have to wonder if my silence is me angry , my phone is either dead or I’m trying to breathe
❤️You don’t have to feel “crazy” or apologize for losing your mind , I’ve been there
❤️You don’t have to feel uncomfortable telling about all your dreams and accomplishments because I am rooting for you
❤️You don’t have to hold back on sending me awesome cleaning pics or amazing adventures , I love that kind of stuff
❤️You don’t have to feel fake or weird because one day you were angry about a situation and then the next day you are happy , I’ve been there
❤️You don’t have to edit how “out there” you are just speak your mind and heart , I am a weirdo I get it
❤️You don’t have to say “sorry” because you have to go because your family needs you , I know what that’s like
❤️You don’t owe me any explanations , I just care about you and being ourselves
❤️ you don’t have to wonder if our conversation stays between us , I take things to the grave
If you are my friend , you don’t have to be anything but YOU . If you are my friend you will know my advice is in love , especially if im scared something will harm you. There is no wondering or some motive . Just purely friendship in this sometimes unfriendly world .
When you have seen darkness , you crave every bit of light . I want to see you win, I want to see you grow, I want to see you accepted , I want to see you loved , I want to see YOU ❤️
As I woke up this morning , exhausted in pain with blisters (because I decided to wear shoes I knew would hurt , but honestly didn’t want to take the time to get my walking shoes from under the Rv.) I stumbled to the coffee pot believing that one cup of coffee was going to change all the world’s problems . As I waited patiently for that magic brew , each child piled into the kitchen area ordering what they wanted like the huddle house and I quickly bit my tongue and said “good morning, I have breakfast planned already.” As I continued to wait ,I heard Amaris wake up speaking in the cutest voice , “mommy, come get me pweaaasse.” Then I was like ok, it’s going to be a good day. I pick her up and she quickly gets down to play .As I started cooking , the gas would not ignite and as I look for a lighter , Nathan says “mom, hurry I need your help.” By this time I could feel this overwhelming feeling begin to fill my chest . We made it past a few obstacles this morning without getting angry , we got this, so I thought . 🤦♀️ I then get to Nathan who had baby poop on his clothes and Amaris sitting there with a blow out diaper . I took my breaths in and out and said “ok, I’ll get the baby, you start wiping your clothes and throw them in a plastic bag and jump in the shower .” He gets to the shower and I grab the top cabinet soap after finishing with Amaris and realized the shaking from the rv driving rattled it open and poured over the whole top cabinet . That’s when the annoyed complaining began. “Why can’t anyone pick up after themselves , why can’t anyone just know what to do without having to ask me for everything ?” It didn’t end there , I started mad cooking , if you don’t know what that is then you are a saint lol . As I was cooking and making plates , I sat down to eat on the couch because I didn’t even want to maneuver anything right now . I started thinking to myself , all the moms and great women I know are always complimented with things like , “she was always so patient, my mom never had to raise her voice , she was always filled with grace when she spoke ”and I just started feeling the guilt and condemnation hit . Yes , every morning doesn’t go this way , but man was I a jerk this morning .
Then I started thinking about even though we are so excited about this amazing opportunity living this dream of ours , we are still living . Just because you reach your dream doesn’t mean life is just emptied of trials and tribulations .
Being aggravated this morning actually gave me a chance to think .
I then realized I was bordering being impressive over being inspiring . I was becoming filtered over just being me .
I don’t want to make dreams seem unattainable or that when your dream happens , life is just so perfect with no annoyances .
I want you to see that anything is possible with God ! His mercy is new everyday ! His grace is sufficient ! God gives you the desires of your heart ! But in the midst of it all , if we didn’t have moments where we needed his grace like this morning , then we wouldn’t realize the magnitude of his Goodness or our need for a savior . If we didn’t have desires that seem impossible , then we would somehow be able to take full credit for his unmerited favor and hand in our lives . We wouldn’t need faith . If we were able to be perfect, patient, and holy on our own , we wouldn’t need the supernatural strength and power of the Holy Spirit.
Today , I choose purpose and inspiration over perfection and being impressive .
One day I may Share a beautiful landscape and then the next struggle to even get out of bed. Today I choose purpose over perfection for the 100th time .
Today I choose to see Jesus instead of myself or my mistakes .
In the midst of all of this .
I felt the Holy Spirit remind me of these truths ….
Rest in God’s promises for you , rest and stop striving for perfection and things that you believe will take away all of life’s problems . Strive for peace, hope , faith , and love . Seek the Kingdom first and all these things will be given . Things also being patience , good choices, and spiritual fruit ,not just earthly things .
Hey y’all , I know I’ve been silent for a little bit. Every time I wanted to post I had the urging to wait . I question whether the cares of this world like being a homemaker, mommy, and wife started taking front seat . For now , I’ll say I believe I needed to be obedient and allow God to do some heart work after going through a trial that was so close to leaving me bitter . Now, after God’s amazing grace and favor , many changes have been made and the words are flowing faster than ever before. So here we go my beautiful family in Christ 😍. He will use this too 😍
The past 13 years of me and michael’s relationship there has been ups and downs . Good decisions and down right dumb decisions . There has been wisdom and there has been foolishness . We have both feasted and we have had famine . We have had amazing times and we have had tragedy . We have been unselfish and so selfish. We have either grown or gone backwards . You see , where we are now , finally living our dream , didn’t happen overnight . For some people it does , but for us it didn’t . Did we have some absolute unmerited favor to be where are now , yes ! Did we just “do” everything right to get here NO. However , we do have a Father in heaven who does not lie and even perfectly places every single step that we need to make it to the will he has for us . When we walk off course , he provides a way out. How radical ? You see ,
Every single positive and negative God has used for our good . We aren’t these super amazing powerful people who just came up with all this on our own. God gave us the desire to reach people a different way . You know what , even that we don’t do with our own strength . We haven’t been consistent either , We have at times even given up our dream to be what others would call “responsible ”. We got tired of criticism , so we conformed . But you know , being criticized and happy is so much better than being told to “ settle down” and be miserable because that’s just not how God made us . Not everyone is like us and that’s totally amazing because the world can’t function if everyone was exactly the same . That’s the beauty of it all. When we live the life we were called to live , the life we were knit for in Jesus, there is this peace . We all have Perfectly woven talents , gifts,and personalities that God knew this world needed in our DNA. It’s ok if your light may look different than someone else’s , your light may be sprinkled with glitter 😂, the substance is what is the same . Today , let’s Love our neighbor , even if your neighbor changes constantly because your family decided to live in an RV. ❤️ Remember today, God’s goodness isn’t calculated by our performance or our works . Believe today in the “Good News” of the gospel and the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross and see supernatural provision in your life . Blessings and favor over your family today 🙂
“We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28
One day My oldest child Nathan set up a little made up stage and asked for the whole family to watch him do magic tricks. We all gathered around him and watched in anticipation to be tricked. As he performed the first trick, he had some glitches and we could clearly see what he was trying to do . The next time he had this handkerchief and actually stumped me for a minute and then a pretend finger fell off his hand into his magic box. We had a good laugh , but it wasn’t until he performed his final trick that we actually were stumped. He asked for us to look at something in the distance and not knowing what to expect we did. Then he started this really cool quarter trick. First he had one quarter disappear, then he had two, then three , then they all vanished. I was like woah, that was actually good and I wasn’t expecting that. After finishing the trick, I said “how in the world did you do that?” for a minute there I thought this child had perfected slight of hand or something. After laughing from being able to trick us, he said “Mom, when I told ya’ll to look at that object, I quickly slipped a quarter under each of your legs, then when ya’ll were concentrating so hard on the coin holder trying to catch me, I would slide my hand under your leg grab another quarter .” I looked at him puzzled. How did I miss that?I thought I was paying attention.
That’s when the revelation hit.
A few weeks ago, I felt some sort of scheme was unfolding in my life and I thought I accurately depicted where it was going to come from, so I focused my full attention on that area. Only to find out two weeks later that although my intentions were right, I was still tricked and unprepared. I had literally stopped everything I was doing to really pray and keep my eyes open to this specific area of vulnerability. When I woke up this morning, I realized two weeks went by. I was neglecting the area I was growing in, to protect the area I was vulnerable.
The same look on my face when Nathan tricked me, was similar to the face I woke up this morning and made. How? How did I let the enemy trick me ? I was prayer purposefully, I was seeking an answer and being so watchful ? You see when the enemy showed himself in a distant area of my life that was not surrendered completely, I started trying to control it all over again. Believing if I prayed enough, or focused on it enough, that it would somehow change. You see, prayer works and so does staying focused, but the idea that my timeline or that my actions was going to change it,wasn’t.
You see, this area in my life has been one to break my spirit many times, my heart has crumbled, and I just want to ball up on cry. It’s one of those areas that take complete trust, because you can not change it on your own or in your own power. It’s an area where you have to trust God will work it all out, just like he did with me.
I know one day this will be a testimony in this area, but for now , it’s a place I decided to completely surrender to God. I felt as if I lost something , almost mourning having to let this fight go. Let this be up to God . Let this area go through the process. This is on of those steps that didn’t “feel” good but I have so much relief. It is not mine anymore, it’s not my responsibility, it’s not my project. This is a time where I can finally say that prayer and believing in God’s ability to do what he did for me again,for someone else,is Exactly what is needed right now.
In reality, I was never actually in control . I was never really going to change anything on my own and by my own ways. You see, the way Nathan got me distracted and ultimately tricked me by reverting my attention is the same way the enemy distracted me from my Calling , my message to seemingly “work” on something out of my control. This season is a season where I am meant to “speak up” I am meant to witness to the Goodness of God. Other people can not stop what God has started. My own strength is not needed in this fight, but my willingness to hold on to God’s.
This is not the season to give up and throw in the towel just because I have not seen the victory in the natural . My witness is not trampled by the actions of others, nor should it be hindered.
The thing about an illusion or trick, is that it actually didn’t happen. It is a way to distract to make you think it did. It is a device the enemy uses on God’s children to blind us from the true attack. It is a way for us to focus on the things that are already being worked on by God that is personal to distract us from the furthering of the Kingdom . For example:
The enemy gives you symptoms, to make you focus on a sickness that was already healed by the stripes of Jesus.
The enemy gives you anxiety, to worry about a care that has already been taken on by our Savior.
The enemy gives you depression , to distract you from the joy that is complete in Christ and the deliverance that is already yours.
The enemy gives you self consciousness and intimidation to keep you focused on what you can see then WHO YOU ARE. To distract you from becoming everything God wants you to be for the Kingdom.
The enemy uses guilt from your mistakes to take away the perfect peace and assurance of the Righteousness and forgiveness you already have in Christ.
The enemy also gives you a drive to be religious and completely busy with “God’s” work to distract you from fruitful works and Joy of your salvation .
Most of all the enemy likes to create an illusion that anything that strengthens your relationship with Christ in secret without being seen , is not as effective as being consistent by worldly standards and timelines.
You see brothers and sisters in Christ. the world is not run like the Kingdom. The Kingdom is not built by worldly means and schemes. The kingdom is built on spirit and truth. The kingdom is not built on accolades and qualifications of this world. It is built on a solid foundation; it is built on the finished work of Jesus. It is built in secret and revealed in Public. The kingdom is built with LOVE. We are witnesses to the glory and power of the Kingdom. We are lights to a dark world.
With the enemy’s trickery we have been building a Kingdom that “appears” Godly but without power, without signs and absent of Wonders. WE have built a Kingdom of worldly accolade with some hierarchy and religious qualifications. We have puffed up when we must humble. We have controlled where we should surrender. We have become wise and have now become fools to things of God. Now is the time, Now is the time to realize the trick. Humble ourselves and repent (change our minds) about how Kingdom business is supposed to be ran. Not by human authority but by God. Then, then we will not be carried by every wind and illusion from the enemy. We will Change the world not by our Power but the power of Christ that is in us.
As I laid down with my youngest daughter, Amaris, I realized she was peeking out at me with her eyes pretending to be asleep. I too started peeking out my eyes to make her laugh and out of nowhere I was really shocked to realize the difference in view when our eyes are squinted , one eye closed and other eye open. I started experimenting , because that’s what you do when you have four kids and things like this becomes cool. I did this several times , to just really capture what all I was missing through each perspective . To my surprise A LOT.
Seriously , before you continue reading , take a moment . Focus on one area and Squint your eyes , what do you see ? Now open them , what do you see ? Close your left eye , what do you see ? Then close your right eye , what do you see ? Now close your eyes all together ? I can answer this one for you here , you see nothing .
You see , that’s that’s when I realized . That is what is going on right now. We as Children of God have choices. We have a loving Father like that. We can choose to open our eyes and see the whole picture, we can choose to squint, keep one eye open or even close them all together . Even though this is absolutely a choice, even though we are already forgiven and we can make the choice , is it profitable?
I asked the Holy spirit ,What are the different types of people in this scenario?
I started writing and this is what I heard. The person with the squinted eyes is the person that is looking from afar, they are the ones that sees the injustice and when their eyes are squinted they can see what is in front with limitations. They are the ones who think they have both eyes open but fail to see what is above them . They see with both eyes but with vengeance as their first reaction . I was then reminded of when my children argue , they squint there eyes at each other to intimidate and all that does is cause the other child to also squint their eyes and builds up anger.
Then there is the person that sees only with their left eye or right eye, that is the person that can only see half the picture. They may have been raised only one way , they can not see both sides. You see they too have a choice to open their eyes , but they choose not to. You see whether you are looking only out of the left or only looking out of the right, both people are missing the full picture. They see half of what’s above and half of what’s in front, but they don’t see both sides. You see, we can not get a full picture of both sides if we aren’t willing to open both eyes. Some out of ignorance and some out of pride.
Then there are the people who close their eyes all together. They are in darkness, they are so spiritually blind that they only know how to follow others who are blind. You see, these are the people who can not see for themselves. They have loved their life always following blindly and never seeing. They close their eyes and also follow their heart , which is deceitful.
The problem here is . whether you are squinting, closing one eye, or are completely blind, you can not truly see what the FULL picture is in front of you.
Then we have the person who has both eyes fully Open. This person may have seen injustice for a long time and stayed silent. Even though you fully see, the time was not right because even though you could see with two eyes fully, you could not speak with the right heart.
You see, in a time of great injustice. A time where senseless murders and oppression are prevalent , it’s not only important to have both eyes open , but a heart that is in the right place. You must see that sensless acts are done to many people who do not deserve it. We must open our eyes and see not only what is in front of us, but all angles. Above, below and what is beside us. The only way to do that is to make the choice to open your eyes, look around, pause and really see what you are looking at . What is really going on?
Then before we speak, we have to ask ourselves, is what I am about to say going to turn this picture I am seeing darker and harder for me to see, or is what I am about to say going to brighten the picture and bring the matter into true focus.
You see when a soldier is aiming their barrel at the enemy , if their gun is not in focus they will miss their target. If the soldier is unable to see they won’t even know what they are aiming at , their true enemy. If a soldier is shooting without a clear picture of who their enemy is, then they may just shoot an ally on accident.
Brothers and Sisters in Christ. We have an enemy in this time. The same enemy that deceived Eve in the garden . The same enemy that stole everything God so freely gave her by whispering lies into her ear. Her deception also caused the downfall of her husband. Today the enemy is whispering in each person of God and we can either listen to or reject that voice. We have that choice.
The enemy is whispering to you that oppression is only for one type Of child and he did so strategically. We must know our Father’s voice in this time and not be led away like sheep ready for slaughter. I’ve been there and it almost cost me my life.
Remember the root of all that is among us, senseless murder, rape, sex trafficking, premature death, suicide, depression, fear , church hurt and racism, all come from one source the father of lies, of deception, the One who hates HUMANITY all together. He is the thief that comes only to steal, kill , and destroy… He is the Devil, Satan , Lucipher !
With that said, I can not end with a name like that because he does not deserve any more attention and just as quickly as we resist him HE must flee.
See church, We have a Savior who suffered the worst death, a death he did not deserve so that we could be free. We have a Savior who’s grace is sufficient for Such a time as this. He is King of all Kings and the king of darkness does not compare , not even a smidgen to Our Great Savior !
We have had our opinions, we have had our anger, we have had words spoken that only a time of great hate and a time of great anguish can bring about. I’ve been there. But now !
Now , while there is time to be in one mind and one accord, we must come together and fight the enemy together. Pentecost is coming and the significance of one mind and one accord hasn’t been greater than in a time like this. We had a true Passover, Easter and now a TRUE Pentecost at hand .
Church, do not miss out on a great time of revival , do not let the enemy steal what is rightfully yours in this season . BE ANGRY, HATE what is Evil but do not sin. Our God loves us so much that he didn’t want us to even avenge ourselves but to over come evil with GOOD. Venegance is the LORDS but we MUST get out of the way and pray , declare and bind what is not of God with the true weapons on our warfare.
In the time the enemy wants us to fight.
In this time the enemy wants us to kill .
In this time the enemy wants us destroy
In this time the enemy wants us quiet
What God asks us to do to overcome an army of evil doesn’t always make sense. Trust me , I understand that. But if God commanded Noah to build and Ark when there was no rain ever recorded, if God ask Moses to lead his people to A Red sea that seemed an impossible barrier that would give the enemies the advantage, If God told Joseph to forgive his brothers after all they did to him and feed them, If God sent Jesus to die for our sins when he was innocent so that you and me could be free.
Then I suggest we do it. I beg we do it.
When they did, what did not make sense. An obedient man saved all of mankind, a man with a stutter led the Children of Israel across a sea without one bit of moisture on their feet, a man sold by his own flesh and blood Became the right hand man to Pharaoh and he blessed his entire family through him, and because Of the greatest act of obedience of all time , a man that chose to die without sin , so that all our sins could be forgiven . The greatest hero of all . JESUS! What He did , made no sense. But because of Jesus we live forever.
We must not be the man who was forgiven of much and go out and demand from others who owe us. After that man’s debt that he could not pay was just forgiven.
Let’s do the opposite right now, and see a mighty move of God. Unite in arms Children of GOD Open your eyes see the full picture and examine your hearts. We have lived for this moment, we have anticipated this mighty move of God ! WE must not hand it over to the enemy.
A man of peace was brutally killed George FLoyd, a man who wanted to see God transform lives, like God did his. Let’s honor him the best we can and come together, to push back darkness with our light. For George and for many others. Let’s finish his mission.
The enemy wants us to take revenge in our own hands because scattered and alone fighting each other is what he wants. Even the enemy knows a kingdom divided against itself Can not stand. Let’s divide the kingdom of darkness family. Let’s see good win !
UNITED WE WILL STAND! UNITED WE SPEAK UP IN UNITY ! UNITED WE SPEAK UP FOR THE POOR AND THE OPPRESSED. UNITED WE WILL FIGHT FOR THEIR RIGHTS WITH THE RIGHT WEAPONS AND THE BATTLE PLAN FROM HEAVEN !
This is how we should pray today.
OUR FATHER WHO ARE IN HEAVEN , HALLOWED BE THY NAME
THY KINGDOM COME, THY WILL BE DONE
ON EARTH AS IT IS IN HEAVEN,
GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD AND FORGIVE US OF OUR TRESPASSES AS WE FORGIVE THOSE WHO TRESPASS AGAINST US
LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION BUT DELIVER US FROM EVIL
FOR THINE IS THE KINGDOM ! THE POWER ! AND THE GLORY FOREVER AND EVER
IN JESUS PRECIOUS NAME, AMEN
I command right now all eyes to be opened and all hearts to be guarded in this time. I cast out any root of bitterness the enemy has planted. I command every evil thought that has taken root to be burned in the name of Jesus.
I declare Children of God , we will not miss out on our promise land. Together, we will see a mighty move of God. WE won’t miss it ❤
I pray that the mighty battle plan of God be brought to all believers during this time, that we listen for his voice so we will see victory to ALL injustice. That every believer know that God is for them and wants his children to come close and be comforted and equipped with the next step. Cry out to our Father, he is waiting. In Jesus name , AMEN
“Truly I say to you, unless you will be converted and become like children, you will not enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” Matthew 18:3
You know the days where your kids have seemingly lost their minds and you question your sanity ? You know on those days that one child in particular will try you over and over and just forget all the rules . Well this was the exact scenario a few days ago with my second to youngest daughter Jayden.
If anyone knows Jayden , you know she is my free spirited , soft hearted, and super hilarious child . I am pretty sure broadway or some sort of acting is in her future ok. She is our child that we are able to look at in a certain way and she will stop doing whatever it is that is wrong . But this day in particular just wasn’t happening .
So of course , I lose it . I “tried” to be calm , I “tried” to let it not build up . But yeh, I failed .Honestly ,what she was doing wasn’t horrific, it was just all throughout the day little things that were clearly defiant and just aggravating ( for lack of better words).Of course I let guilt set in and I came to her and assured her that getting correction was not wrong; however , the way I corrected was.
I probably looked like a toddler throwing a tantrum honestly haha ( it’s funny now, but I felt horrible). So we had our talk and everything calmed down probably because we assured each other that everything was settled.
I know it sounds bad , but I was like , yeh I feel bad how I reacted , but at least now she’s listening ( don’t hate me , I am human too) . As soon as that thought crossed my mind , Jayden asked me “ mom, can I have some ice cream and then go to the trail to ride scooters. “
If y’all could see my face . I thought to myself , (this is going to sound bad) , but I thought …. “did she really just ask for dessert annnnnd going to a trail to ride her scooter when we finally just had some peace between each other . “ Thank God I kept that thought to myself , even though my face may have talked for me . If I would have spoken too quickly I would have missed what the Holy Spirit was showing me in that moment .
You see , even though we said sorry and made things right and I DID forgive her , I was still shocked that she just so openly asked for not one but two things. It was already getting late , I’m already exhausted and it was getting to the point of settling down , I mean completely inopportune timing . I didn’t even have time to really just come to terms with my own attitude and forgive myself fully and apparently not fully forgetting what she had done ( I’m not God).
Heck, I was still analyzing what part of her childhood memories I messed up or the guilt of possibly breaking her spirit haha. ( only funny now).
How could my child even feel comfortable coming to me after a day full of agitation.
That’s when the revelation hit .
Many times in life I would hide my needs , wants, desires, even failures from God because let’s face it , I wasn’t where I thought I should be . People would say , “ come as you are” and when I did I was the object of judgement and gossip. Like, listen I didn’t choose my superpower at the time to be crazy, depressed, and needy ok. I brought my demons and the people fled . So , I thought if church people who aren’t perfect like God are ashamed of me , how much more will My perfect Father be .
Ouch , yeh I was super wrong and my belief system was influenced by a lot of outward and religious spirits ( including me , so cringe).
What the Holy Spirit was showing me through Jayden was boldness , faith in her mother’s love and ability to meet her demands despite her outward actions . You see , God doesn’t want us to come boldly to the throne room of Grace because we are perfect and never mess up on our own . He wants for us to come boldly and have confidence in his grace and in his position as our Abba ( daddy) in heaven , so that he can meet the needs. We come boldly because he is well pleased with Jesus and he sees Jesus , so whew. Whether it be healing, financial, spiritual, unanswered questions , behavior, whatever it is we need to come boldly.
See unlike God I have limitations in my flesh , I am unable to forget when my daughter just sinned so sometimes it lingers , Even though I want to give her all she asks , sometimes that something extra is conditional.
With God we are saved by grace , nothing we did, it is a gift. He is not shocked or surprised when we come to him after acting foolish , asking bold requests . He is constant in our relationship, he is forgiving , he wipes the slate clean constantly . You see he isn’t limited in his sight by our flesh , because it’s been covered in Jesus blood . He sees Jesus .
So rest easy friends and go boldly to the throne room of grace fully forgiven asking and making requests know to our Father.
He isn’t going to look at you like I did my daughter shocked at how could so many requests be made after a day of aggravation. No, he is pleased that we trust and believe that he made a way for us to be this close. The good news is we don’t have to be disntant from God’s power like before Jesus sacrificed his life and torn the veil. Now we are seated near at his right hand basking in his presence , not hindered by our behavior . We are only hindered by our unbelief of Jesus sacrifice and unbelief of who we are in Him.
I pray today that you come boldly to our Father and make all requests known, tell him where you are lacking in any area. Draw closer to Him and bask in his presence . Pray for the Holy Spirit to lead you to the throne room of grace and his powerful presence . Then you will see that despite your behavior or outward issues , your Daddy is waiting for you to come to him so he can show you a way out .
I pray that you no longer depend on your own ability to be righteous or holy but, Jesus’ ability to be righteous and Holy. I pray that you see yourself the way God does and when you accept that love , you will start seeing others in that way as well. In Jesus name , amen
Will we have weak days , will we have days where we don’t “feel” spiritual … yes, but even though we are not constant , God is . His promises are yes and amen, unconditionally and with all sincerity .
There is not a better confidant, friend,and helper than the spirit of God . Only he can give perfect direction and action plans . So come boldly brothers and sisters, he’s waiting with excitement .
So lord , I choose to come To you as my child comes to me . Boldly and knowing that she is forgiven. Knowing I want what is best for her and want to see her succeed . Knowing I want to help her solve her issues . Knowing I want to see her well and pursuing the purpose she was made for . Knowing despite her mistakes I will help every way I can.
We are not Perfect alone, so let’s rest and rely on the ONE who is . God ❤️ …People , even me , can’t give you perfect relationship. Only HIM .
So I felt led to a different kind of post today… so I pray the Holy spirit opens your minds and reveals to you truth that points straight to how amazing and wonderful Jesus is.
When you fall from Grace , you are no longer believing that you are saved by faith through Jesus, But of yourselves. You condemn yourself . You put heavy burdens, loads, and morality on yourself. When in reality, our might and strength will never be enough.
See Jesus.. “Yeshua” literally means Salvation. So when we are putting on the mind of Christ we are putting on the helmet of Yeshua . Let’s now see why this is soooooo important to get to first, when we come to know the Lord. When a Roman soldier puts on armor they use a helmet to protect their brain. According to the mayoclinic.com , “The brain is an amazing three-pound organ that controls all functions of the body, interprets information from the outside world, and embodies the essence of the mind and soul. … The brain controls our thoughts, memory and speech, movement of the arms and legs, and the function of many organs within our body.” ( More in depth writing is coming on this later on, I am just skimming the surface on this revelation the Holy spirit gave to me) So Family, the helmet of salvation in the armor of God is literally the helmet of Yeshua. All these functions are so , so important to our daily lives and destiny. It effects how we pray, what we pray , how we approach God, who we believe God to be… I mean. I could go on and on. But that’s on another blog. Now you see why this is so important?
You know when you start studying the Word of God with your mind of Christ on , oh how the story changes. You are no longer scared to read the bible or just waiting for more Do’s and don’ts. It’s no longer a book where you go see what others are doing wrong or how self righteous you are.Oh no, it becomes one of the greatest mysteries revealed to you in such an amazing way because you are being led by the spirit. You aren’t reading a story that the wisest or most knowledgeable could ever truly understand on their own , it’s like your own secret message leading to the Treasures of heaven . It is not understood with human intellect but meticulously revealed in many different ways in many different seasons . IT is discerned with a spirit that puts even the first the same as the last, the rich and the poor and even the slowest of learners and fastest of learners on the same playing field. You feel like you are going down a never ending hunt sometimes, but a life changing one. You get one train of thought and it leads to another and it becomes an all out investigation . You know one of those investigations you do after watching a court case and just need evidence for some sort of closure. You know that evidence you look for when you search your whole heart mind and strength until late hours of the night clicking article after article. Just to know the truth . The cool thing about Having the Holy spirit as a friend and God as a good good father who can never lie, you will always, I mean always find what you are seeking at the right time . You are not left confused and dissatisfied, its always a search that ends in peace or action for the next step. It’s like endless awe and wonder. Now there is times, where you feel kind of bored and think, ummm I know this scripture. Only for a revelation of the meaning to truly hit a week later, who knows, maybe while vacuuming the floor.
I wanted to share this because as I reveal what is revealed to me through revelation , I want you to realize that I am a homemaker who is beloved by God not through my actions but because of Jesus’ finished work on the cross. I mean I am pretty low on the social totem poll to the world , lets face it, haha . I mean , but really guys a homemaker given wisdom supernaturally used by a powerful God that doesn’t need me, but chooses to use me , to spread the Good Good news. So it’s not of myself or human wisdom. I just want to see lives transformed and people complete in Him. I just want everything that comes out of my mouth or typed through my fingers on a keyboard to point to Jesus. I honestly go back and read what is written and I am like, who wrote that? I can’t humanly explain how I come to these conclusions or revelations on my own, because I don’t. It is always a scripture or bible story that didn’t make sense at the time and BAM it hits. Sometimes it’s just deeper meaning to something I didn’t previously know fully. Not anything biblically new , but like in depth truth of God’s written word, that’s new to me. My prayer is that through sharing my revelations, it will spark your spirit to seek revelation for yourselves as well. It is the most satisfying and awe inspiring experience. To know that God will use all means to help me understand, and to reveal truths to me that I need, exactly when I need it, mostly through my children.
The only thing I can give advice about when it comes to revelations is truly just taking a moment to be a fly on the wall so to speak throughout your day. To be present but yet taken back and just observe. Oh, just take a moment from the chaos and distraction and just look and see what can only be seen , when you truly look. To pray and ask for revelation is a huge part for sure also. Sometimes, The silly smiles of my children, the tiny mannerisms , and even just the conversation that they have with each other reveals God’s truths. Sometimes it’s a wake up call when I hear my children being unkind to each other. Especially when I hear things I know is me or my husband. I used to get so down and condemn myself, but now I just say Holy spirit lead me to a better way. As you lead me , they will follow. The pressure of trying to figure it all out isn’t on me alone, I can make the choices but only through knowing I am loved, can I choose a more loving approach. Knowing you are loved eases anxieties and it results in less agitation. Our Abba wants us to succeed in our marriages, in our parenting, and all relationships that we are meant to be a part of. Sweet friend, grace is there to take the burden off you , you can get up again , you can try again, you can keep moving forward without condemnation. You can come boldy come to the Father asking all sorts of questions and even talking about things you struggle with , and asking advice.
Yeh you may need to ask your kids for forgiveness or your spouse, but you can’t expect to learn without mistakes. But the Good news is , your mistakes don’t stack against you , it’s an endless washing of the blood of the lamb over you every single day. Rest easy do not be overcome with anxiety and thoughts of your mistakes, you are loved , you are holy , you are righteous and you are moving forward. Do not give up.
When we Are saved we are legit going through a brain transplant. Putting away the former things, like literally born again. If you are a newborn you do not have memories, so literally we must do away with all past things ,a new slate. Allow the Holy Spirit to fill your mind with the thoughts of Jesus. Those thoughts about whatever is kind what ever is good, How faithful our heavenly father is, being kingdom minded and knowing we are righteous as he is righteous because of the finished work of the cross. Then keeping our eyes on Jesus and being in awe will result in changed behavior supernaturally. Do we make a choice , yes.. However, when we keep our eyes on Jesus , we walk in the spirit and love, then every other commandment is fulfilled. Like, Literally our Father set us up to succeed. We just have to put away our fleshly desire to have our hand in places that aren’t ours to mess with so we can take some sort of credit. We must walk by faith. Remind yourself, we are without spot or blemish in the eyes of the father. Yes, the world and even you remember when you messed up before and when you presently mess up . But rest easy, God does not. Have you ever found yourself digging a deeper hole of sin and depression when you constantly think about what you do wrong and that you can never do right.
Try this, know that you are so loved by God , ask him yourself to reveal to you how much you are loved. Open your bible through the eyes of grace and let the forgiveness and love pour all over you. Watch sin and addiction break off your life, Be free child of God ! Do not be bonded by the yolk of slavery. We are now sons and daughters to the most high God.
I am reminded of the Prodigal son, I ask that you take a moment to read Luke 15:11–32 and ask the Holy spirit to reveal to you what is true about how Our daddy delights in us when we come back to him.
Then as you are reminded who you are in Christ, keep asking questions , keep seeking , I promise no other relationship in your life will compare. Don’t get me wrong I love my family , ya’ll know this, but there isn’t a person or thing on this earth that can ever sustain or fulfill the deep places like Jesus. This is not of myself or that I am just this super wise or bold person on my own. Any courage or wisdom, or knowledge of the spirit is a gift from the spirit. So yeh, No boasting , no accolade or achievement on my part. My need for something real , whether that makes me weak or not, was more important than staying empty. I heard someone say, oh christians just are too weak to handle this world, so they need a God to lean on. Well, guilty, I am weak , but he is strong. I can’t do this life or even one ounce of my past without the saving grace , acceptance and Love of the Father. I am not ashamed that I need Jesus to walk in this life and neither should you.
I pray for bondage to be broken , anyone held back from their destiny to start seeking who they are in Christ, I pray for those who are feeling the heaviness of this life to be renewed in Jesus name. I pray for children of God to use your helper the holy spirit, to let him lead you . If Jesus could trust the Holy spirit to raise him from the dead, I can trust him too. I love ya’ll ! My heart just wants for you all to find this freedom , to walk in your spiritual gifts, to walk in health and full abundant life. To seek our Father’s face without being scared or condemned. God loves you so very much. Remember, As Jesus is so are we!
A visual that the Holy spirit showed me a few days ago , really brought peace to my spirit. It was me sitting next to my Abba on the right hand of the throne and anytime evil was coming against me, I rested in Victory with my Father and he sent an angel out without a flinch before it could reach me. I had this assurance that I am so loved, I am protected, I am victorious because of My father. I pray this too helps you see just how close and How intimate of a relationship God wants with you too.
One morning Nathan came into the room and said,” Mom, I have not been able to use the video editor for a long time, can I pleeeease use it.” I said “well, where’s my laptop?” ( at that point I forgot Michael fixed Nathan’s computer) and he said, “it’s also on my computer” Before I could say yes, he said, “no, I want to use your laptop so I know you are watching me , because when you do I feel more confident.” My heart melted and this overwhelming heaviness filled my chest, like that, must catch my breath because it just overwhelmed me with such JOY. I immediately thought, “WOW, even though lately he feels as if we have been unfair as parents, and has truly been verbal about it, he still desires for me to watch him do what he truly loves. He finds confidence, oh that word I have lacked all my life, he grows confident when I am watching him.
That means so much to me because as a parent there are times where you just do not feel like you are getting anything right. As my children grow, my now not so little Nathan is our first. You know the oldest, the one we transition to every new stage of life with first. The one who lives up to the meaning of his name, leader. I think of how sometimes when we take lead in any area of our life, it can seem scary. It does not help that sometimes in life, you do not really realize mistakes until you have already made them, especially in parenting. Despite all the times of when I doubt myself, this one moment of just trust from my son, this longing for my presence, shut up all the voices in my head. Little did he know that he too made me confident.
You know in our world right now, it feels as if you can only truly get your point across, be seen for your talents or even mean anything until the product is finished. Oh, the pressure this society gives on performance. Nathan taught me that the process can be just as beautiful and helpful as the finished product.
I really am just blown away that my child has found something I have lacked my whole life, and that is the confidence to mess up and mess up in front others , knowing that I won’t always get it perfect and that it’s ok. Gosh, I learn so much from these beautiful babies and I can never describe the gratitude. Do we have hard days and just nights where I legit come to the end of myself? Those nights I just want to ball up and ask why God would choose me to be the mother of these amazing children. It’s in those moments, where his grace falls over me and reminds me, that he will guide every step, that as much as I love my children, he loves them more.
That is when the revelation hit.
This is how confident we should feel when we are walking into the calling God has given us. You know that specific area he has gifted you for his glory. It may not be your job right now, because let us face it, how on earth will this gift supply what we need right now? Your gift will make room for you and He will provide.The lord showed me through my child that all I need is to stay in his presence, be confident in his presence and want him to watch every step of the way. To be confident that he is rooting us on and has eyes of grace for any missteps. To know as surely as I want for my child to succeed, our Abba wants us to succeed as well. He set us up for victory, not a failure. He gently whispers I am for you; I am for you; you have everything you need in me.
Through the eyes of Grace, we see that he wants to watch, lead, guide, calm us when we get frustrated because we cannot figure it out on our own. Oh, but when you allow his presence to be there, you will not mess everything up, just look up and he will redirect you to the solution.
You see, when Nathan is on the laptop editing, he always starts off so excited! He is so glad I allowed him to work on his talent for editing videos. Oh, when he starts, he is just so gung-ho! He Is just trying new things, clicking on everything, and just ahh zealous. He quickly looks,” mom, mom, Look, LOOK, watch me.” As time goes by, he becomes frustrated, he gets to a point where he faces an obstacle, because there is a new skill or lesson to be learned. In this moment, when an obstacle arises , if he was in any way scared of judgment, then this would be a time he would give up. Instead he knows that I want him to succeed, not suffer harshly. He knows that I want him to find out the solution.
He then asks me quickly, “mom, where do I find the answer to this?” I do not always give an outright answer to my children, But I always provide a way for them to find it. All you must do is ask knowing that I want the best for you, so be confident. All he must do is realize I am just watching in complete love and just waiting for him to turn to me with every question. I have been there, you start something, and along the way there is more learning to do. I can look at him with eyes of Grace because there is no mess up or wrong turn that he can take, that will lead me to judge him , but to guide him and comfort him knowing I am for him.
The foundation is necessary, the basic understanding is necessary, the tasks that require help is necessary in this life. Coming to the end of ourselves is necessary and oh so beautiful when the Father’s presence brings you confidence and not condemnation and guilt.
Oh the joy our Abba (Daddy) must feel when we truly understand how much he is for us. How much we see ourselves as beloved when we put on our mind of Christ. You see when I think of what would Jesus mind and thoughts consist of , I can go to scripture and see that he knows he is the beloved who his father is well pleased, when Lazarus died he already knew his Father already gave him everything he asked for ( but it was for us, that he spoke), you see he knows where he is placed at, at the right hand of the father , fully equipped for everything the Father sends him to do. He is confident that any direction the Father sends him, that he will know the way has already been perfectly orchestrated.
So believers, to all the beloveds whom he is well pleased, ask your Heavenly Father to watch you, so you will be confident. When you are walking in life, do not wait, ask freely and he will provide the solution. Oh! enter the throne room of his GRACE, confident that he is wanting to see you succeed. Oh, how righteous we are by faith. Even better If you believe you lack faith, that too is not of your own ability. The scripture says that Jesus is the Author and finisher of our faith. Oh that too, Grace and faith has already been finished at the cross. So put on that mind of Christ and rest in the finished work of your faith. Fruitful works will follow without the yolk of slavery. It is a by product of our understanding of the Father’s love. Believe in his love, grace and goodness and every addiction, bad habit, bad fruit will supernaturally fall way. In our Father, listen, in our Father we are complete because of Jesus.
Put away the works in vain, oh the Martha’s in this time, rest like Mary and what you receive can never be taken.
Oh my sweet family in Christ, I have GOOD NEWS, Oh the greatest News of all. We do not need to feel anxious or pressured when we ask our Daddy to be a part of our lives. You are not the author and finisher of your faith, you are not the one with the power of your own might to supernaturally transform. When you come to the father, as an infant drink of the milk, get to know your Daddy and he will teach you who you are. Would you send an infant out to work immediately, oh but an infant doesn’t even know what the works are, step back and let the Holy spirit work Believers. Let all works be fruitful by the Holy Spirit. Let the infant know that in order for the works to have power it is not of themselves. Let those righteous deeds be done with JOY and hope. Put away the grumbling and complaining. They need to know they are so loved, righteous and complete in Christ. Then the byproduct of His love and acceptance is fruitful works. Rest easy and know that God is God. Be free my sisters and brothers in Christ, let the Holy spirit lead and great revival will come. He Is the father full of UNMERITED favor and grace, the law already brought us to the end of ourselves our inability to be righteous on our own, and oh How sweet is it that Jesus came to fulfill it because on our own it is impossible. Oh that we may have a renewed relationship with our Heavenly Father. If that alone was not enough, Our Daddy loves us so much , he sent a helper ( the Holy Spirit) to gently remind us, to comfort us , to lead us down the roads that are the best for us, to give us power our friend who is gentle and oh so mighty. The one who whispers and brings down a might rushing wind. The one who whispers you are loved and Brings Our savor back from the dead. You see our daddy sent us the best equipment to see us succeed , be transformed by the renewing of your minds, be filled with the spirit all you have to do is ask and be still in him and listen for the steps, the direction . Go into the secret place and let him Guide you.
For those who do not know have a personal relationship with Jesus, it’s ok that this will sound like straight foolishness. But if you to want to experience a love like this and walk into your destiny, in scripture we are told to repent, ( turn way/ change our minds) about sin , Believe in the son Jesus and this finished work at the cross and be saved. Then you will be filled with your helper the holy spirit to guide. Then as an infant, immediately Drink of the spiritual milk of his word, just like a baby and rest on the Father’s chest for that skin to skin contact and let him love you and carry you like an infant and speak to you from his word. If you find yourself not understanding, ask for wisdom and it will be given. Put off all the former things you perceived to know about the Lord and who YOU used to be and let our Father reveal himself and show you for himself who He and who you are now. From there my friend, you will go through stages of growth and understanding, but never forget that Just as quickly as my son could turn around ask for help and direction or even to show me praise, Our father will be there for you to.
Come, whether saved or unsaved. Put off the Former things, your Daddy wants to see you succeed. So, invite him, so you too…
Can be Confident.
16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
“and the is Salvation in no one else; for there is no other name under heaven that has been given among men by which we must be saved .” Acts 4:12
“he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit” Titus 3:5
“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—
not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9
At the Home of Martha and Mary
38 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him.39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said.40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” luke 10:38-42
John 1:14-17(AMP) And the Word (Christ) became flesh, and lived among us; and we [actually] saw His glory, glory as belongs to the [One and] only begotten Son of the Father, [the Son who is truly unique, the only One of His kind, who is] full of grace and truth (absolutely free of deception). John testified [repeatedly] about Him and has cried out [testifying officially for the record, with validity and relevance], “This was He of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me has a higher rank than I and has priority over me, for He existed before me.’” For out of His fullness [the superabundance of His grace and truth] we have all received grace upon grace [spiritual blessing upon spiritual blessing, favor upon favor, and gift heaped upon gift]. For the Law was given through Moses, but grace [the unearned, undeserved favor of God] and truth came through Jesus Christ.
Romans 5:15-17But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much morethe grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many. And the gift is not like that which came through the one who sinned. For the judgment which came from one offense resulted in condemnation, but the free gift which came from many offenses resulted in justification. For if by the one man’s offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ.
Romans 6:14-16For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace. What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? Certainly not! Do you not know that to whom you present yourselves slaves to obey, you are that one’s slaves whom you obey, whether of sin leading to death, or of obedience leading to righteousness?
Come back into his Grace
Galatians 5:4You have become estranged from Christ, you who attempt to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace.
What Does James 2:26 Mean by “Faith without Works is Dead?”
“In James chapter 2, James writes that “as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.” Here James affirms that deeds (or actions) are the byproduct of a living faith. Works do not justify us or make us righteous before God, nor are they the means to salvation. Rather, our deeds are the fruit that grows from one who is obedient to God’s commands and transformed by His grace.” Crosswalk.com Joel Ryan