Hours before heading to Mesa Verde Cave dwellings , I was watching a video with our kids about the history of Colorado. The video gave in- depth information and instantly drew us to another video about the cave dwellings specifically . We decided to watch a guided tour as we were teeming with excitement for this newest and most anticipated adventure .
As we embarked on this video , I instantly realized what I expected, wasn’t reality . This wasn’t a nice safe walk and boom beautiful cave dwellings . This most photographed portion of the destination, the absolute cherry on top photograph in my mind ,involved climbing a ladder , did I mention cliff ? My heart began palpitating , I had visions of my children falling down and me missing a step causing a crowd of others getting hurt because I slipped . My palms started sweating and I began to unintentionally hold my breath. My kids could see my face and said what’s wrong ? I quickly changed my face to a smile and said “oh nothing , just watching the video.”
They said “ oh my gosh mom isn’t this going to be amazing “ I thought to myself “ no, it’s absolutely terrifying and I can’t breathe “ but I responded with “ absolutely” . Of course giving my children anxiety about it , wasn’t the wisest choice so I chose excitement .
As we continued watching the video the tour guide said , the only advice I can give you is “ don’t look up and don’t look down , focus on the steps you are on .” The crowd laughed and one lady replied “ well of course , if you look down you see how far you can fall, and if you look up you get anxious about how much higher you have to climb .”
You would think that’s when the revelation hit , but nope , my anxiety heightened and I realized that they too understood the fearfulness of climbing the ladder and needed to lighten the mood . The kids looked at me after the conversation ended between the people and they too looked at me like “ uh mom, are you going to let us do this ?” Mom wouldn’t let us do this if it wasn’t safe or we could get hurt,” replied Nathan .
I paused and said “honestly kids , everything we do involves risk. Getting in a car, walking on the street or even eating food . But we do it , because there is no enjoyment in life if you constantly think of the what if . Some risk takes little to no courage and some take lots of courage and then some takes courage that we absolutely can not formulate on our own without God .”
As I was speaking I was navigating to the cave dwellings website , still sweating with this undeniable pressure in my chest . I was locating ticket prices and age limits for everyone and an alert popped up. It said the treehouse version of the cave dwellings , the part of the attraction we all anticipated and longed for was closed for a need for structural inspection. I honestly had the biggest ,I mean biggest weight off my shoulders .
There would be no climbing the ladder .
The kids were a bit disappointed that we got rerouted again, but we ended up finding the coolest campground after and decided to stay 2 nights , which we never do . I truly believe the kids had more fun here then they would have on the big scary ladder .
Fast forward to being back on the road after a heated debate with my husband and as we both sat in silence . Then the actual revelation hit …..
“Steps , steps, steps .” That’s all I kept saying to my husband or anyone I meet , which I know gets annoying . But honestly that’s how I feel the Holy Spirit speak to me about my life . The lord knows my anxious thoughts and calms them with an assurance that each step has already been made , I just need to listen closely even when it doesn’t make sense and ultimately it will lead exactly where I am meant to be .
That’s when the remark of the tour guide in the video actually resonated with me . Now as my mind was focused on gaining strength and some sort of peace after being completely agitated , it all started coming in.
You see when I was anxious and not capturing my thoughts , I was unable to receive revelation. I was so focused on the fear .
You see , there are steps to every thing in life . Whether Worldly order or kingdom order . I have a choice. Should I listen to the gentle whisper that leads to life and fruit or listen to the world and lead to exhaustion and self promoting gain and pride .
Both choices have steps . The world’s steps are usually ones you see , the ones that always makes sense , a+b=c , ones you can explain the outcome . Kingdom steps usually take faith which means you do not see at first , ones that sometimes make no sense , and 1+ God = exceedingly abundantly more than you could have ever done on your own .
The key to your ultimate destination is simply what the man in the video said . Do not look up and do not look down , focus on the step you are on .
When you are climbing steps and are struggling to gain footing on one , do you immediately try to grasp above even though you aren’t firmly settled on the step you are on ? Listen , I wish I could say I’m not that stubborn , but I have tried this and yeh , moving forward when you aren’t firmly rooted or have learned the lesson of that step ,results in pain , being overworked unnecessarily or falling straight on your butt .
Today I’m not physically able to see my promise , today I am still wobbling on the current step but still believing , and today I am accepting and surrendering to the process that this step entails for my good . I am focusing on the current step that God has me on , without looking up the ladder with anxiety with how far I have to go , or looking down ( or back) with how far I could fall.
All my steps are placed , all your steps are placed . God is for you . The steps are perfectly laid out for you and your destiny . Do not be anxious . This is for his glory .His goodness and mercy follow you , so stand firm , keep listening , keep seeking , keep asking ….. what you seek you will find . What God has for you , is for you … God doesn’t run out of his goodness , God doesn’t forget , God is patient .
This is kingdom business , his ways are not ours, so rest easy …. Everything God has promised already exists , so let’s believe 🙂 ❤️